Choosing a wife A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money. The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her hair done, new [...]
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Each Friday night after work, sun, snow or rain, Bubba would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a moose steak. But, all of Bubba’s neighbors were Catholic. And since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating meat on Friday. The delicious aroma from the grilled moose steaks was causing such a problem for [...]
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Three guys and a lady were sitting at the bar talking about their professions. The first guy says ” I’m a Y.U.P.P.I.E, you know… Young, Urban, Professional, Peaceful, Intelligent, Ecologist.” The second guy says “I’m a D.I.N.K, you know… Double Income, No Kids.” The third guy says, ” I’m a R.U.B, you know… Rich, Urban, [...]
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Three convicts were on the way to prison. They were each allowed to take one item with them to help them occupy their time while incarcerated.On the bus, one turned to another and said, “So, what did you bring?” The second convict pulled out a box of paints and stated that he intended to paint [...]
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Oh Lord, won’t you burn me a Knoppix CD ?My friends all rate Windows, I must disagree.Your powers of persuasion will set them all free,So oh Lord, won’t you burn me a Knoppix CD ?
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This blind guy walked into a department store with his seeing-eyedog and headed straight for the men’s department. Surroundedby pajamas and neckties, he proceeded to come to a stop,pick up his German Shepherd by the hind legs, and swingthe dog around and around in a circle. A startled clerk ran over to him, saying loudly, [...]
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