A man his father and grandfather go into a bar for a beer. While they’re sitting at the bar a fly is flying around their head. The man spits and hits the fly, sending it into a spiral. It recovers and flys off. The bartender is like,”That was amazing!”The man says,”That was nothing, you should [...]
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The chicken and the egg are laying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face while the egg is frowning and looking slightly annoyed. The egg mutters “Well I guess that answers that riddle“.
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Bono was at a U2 concert in Ireland when he asked the audience for somequiet. Then in the silence, he starts to slowly clap his hands. Holding the audience in total silence, he says into themicrophone…”Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies.” A drunken voice from near the front of the [...]
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– one brown, one yellow, and one black, were sitting in the waiting room at the vet’s surgery when they struck up a conversation. The black lab turned to the brown and said, “So why are you here? “The brown lab replied, “I’m a pisser. I piss on everything –the sofa, the curtains, the cat, [...]
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A Mexican drinks his beer and suddenly throws his glass in the air, pulls out his pistol and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, “In Mexico our glasses are so cheap we don’t need to drink from the same glass twice.” An Iraqi, obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws his glass into [...]
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Hillary Clinton goes to a primary school in New York to talk about the world. After her talk she offers a question time.One little boy puts up his hand. The Senator asks him what his name is.”Kenneth.””And what is your question, Kenneth?””I have three questions: First – whatever happened to the medical health care plan [...]
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One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?” Her [...]
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A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, “I’m drawing God.”The teacher paused and said, “But no one knows what [...]
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