Take the foreign language test

Study each question carefully, then choose the answer that seems “most” correct (TRUE or FALSE) and mark an “X” (just like you sign your name) on the appropriate line at the right. 1. A clitoris is a type of flower ____TRUE____FALSE 2. Pubic hair is a wild rabbit ____TRUE____FALSE 3. “Spread Eagle” is an extinct [...]

The vasectomy

Stan was seconds away from receiving a vasectomy when his brother andsister-in-law barged in the room holding their newborn baby. “Stop! You can’t do this!” exclaimed the brother. “And why not?” asked Stan.“Don’t you want to have a beautiful baby someday like my wife and I have here?” Stan said nothing. The brother grew impatient, [...]

Life lessons

Accept that some days you’re the pigeon, andsome days you’re the statue. Always keep your words soft and sweet, justin case you have to eat them. Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it. Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax [...]

How to choose a wife

Choosing a wife A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money. The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her hair done, new [...]

Does this signpost have the ideal relationship? (For a guy)

Wheres there a will there’s a way

Bubba and his neighbours

Each Friday night after work, sun, snow or rain, Bubba would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a moose steak. But, all of Bubba’s neighbors were Catholic. And since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating meat on Friday. The delicious aroma from the grilled moose steaks was causing such a problem for [...]

What’s your profession

Three guys and a lady were sitting at the bar talking about their professions. The first guy says ” I’m a Y.U.P.P.I.E, you know… Young, Urban, Professional, Peaceful, Intelligent, Ecologist.” The second guy says “I’m a D.I.N.K, you know… Double Income, No Kids.” The third guy says, ” I’m a R.U.B, you know… Rich, Urban, [...]

Keeping busy while in the penitentiary

Three convicts were on the way to prison. They were each allowed to take one item with them to help them occupy their time while incarcerated.On the bus, one turned to another and said, “So, what did you bring?” The second convict pulled out a box of paints and stated that he intended to paint [...]

Geek take on Janis Joplin’s "Mercedes Benz"

Oh Lord, won’t you burn me a Knoppix CD ?My friends all rate Windows, I must disagree.Your powers of persuasion will set them all free,So oh Lord, won’t you burn me a Knoppix CD ?